Caleb is now a year and eight months and is a pretty easy-going toddler I would say (minus the normal toddler moments and tantrums). But maybe I just feel like he is easy now because the first 9 months of his life were ROUGH!
They say colicky babies are hard but this was something else! Having a baby who suffers from acid reflux (or GERD) is no joke and it can last much longer than colic!
I want to share my experience because when I was in the middle of it, I was so desperate to relate to other moms, to just feel like I wasn’t alone and that it would get better. I would stay up late watching videos and reading blog posts of other moms who went through something similar.
If you are a fellow mama going through this you are not alone, and IT GETS BETTER!!
DISCLAIMER: This is my personal infant acid reflux story and I’m sharing some of the things that I chose to do. I am not a medical professional so talk to your baby’s pediatrician if you feel like your baby may have something similar, and check with them to see if implementing something is okay (like sleep training, elevating the head while sleeping, etc). Also, your experience may be different and things may take less time to get better, or it may take longer.
Caleb was a fussy newborn from day one. I don’t know if it was because of the reflux but I remember the first night after he was born, my husband and I looked at each and said “what did we get ourselves into” (jokingly of course!). He began crying at 10 pm and when we finally all fell asleep it was 2:30 am.
After we came home, the first two weeks I feel like were pretty normal with the expected amount of sleep deprivation and just learning how to take care of our first newborn.
BUT THEN… after about two weeks things got much harder.
Looking back, I now know it was because of his reflux (he got diagnosed with GERD at 4 months) but back then I did not know why he was so fussy and felt like maybe I was doing something wrong.
These are the common signs and symptoms of baby reflux:
-coughing or hiccupping when feeding
-irritability while feeding
-not gaining enough weight
-frequent vomiting (unless it is silent reflux)
-frequent coughing or wheezing
-recurrent pneumonia
-arching of the back
-gagging or choking
-disturbed sleep
-irritability
-hoarseness
*There may be other symptoms but these are the common ones that come up commonly (Caleb had them all except for pneumonia).
The Sleep Struggle Was Real…
If I were to say what the hardest part was, it would be the lack of sleep both Caleb and I had until after he turned 6 months old.
It would take at least 40 minutes to an hour of rocking him up and down in my arms before he would fall asleep (that was on a good day), and when he did finally fall asleep he would usually wake up as soon as I would put him down and the crying would start all over again. Sometimes it would take a couple of hours of rocking him up and down before he would fall asleep. This was for both naps and nighttime.
As far as naps went, if I put him down they only lasted about 20 to 40 minutes and if I held him it would be more like an hour.
People would tell me to just put him down drowsy but awake and let me just say THAT DID NOT WORK. He would scream (and I mean SCREAM) until I would pick him up again.
There was also no such thing as rocking him in a swing or bassinet. He had a certain motion he liked and it was in my arms.
He was definitely a high-needs baby but I could tell that he was uncomfortable and it was the reflux that made him so fussy and difficult to soothe. He would squirm in his sleep and make what almost sounded like burping noises and then wake up crying.
At night, Caleb would wake up every 2 hours (if not more) from birth until around 6 months. When he turned 6 months that is when I decided to sleep train him and it was the best decision I have made! After that, things were not perfect all of a sudden but he would only wake up 1 or 2 times throughout the night, which was a HUGE improvement for us!!
His sleep slowly got better from 6 months (with the occasional sleepless nights due to sickness or travel) and now at almost 20 months old, he sleeps through the night consistently.
Naps also improved after sleep training. He began sleeping 2 to 2.5 hours during most naps. Having a set routine really helped with this! He was also put on medication after he turned 4 months old which helped slightly with this as well.
Car Rides Were a Nightmare
Caleb did fine during car rides until he turned a couple of weeks old. After that, it was impossible to go anywhere with him without having him scream the entire way.
I’ve heard of other moms who said the same thing about their reflux baby. I think this is because he preferred to be held upright and being in a car seat made him uncomfortable (plus the car motion might have been a factor as well).
It was really hard to go anywhere so I didn’t go out with him unless I had to.
He wanted to be Held ALL THE TIME
If Caleb was awake, that meant I was holding him in my arms or carrying him in our Ergo baby carrier. This meant that nothing was getting done unless he was sleeping or someone else was with him. I couldn’t put him down in a swing or on the floor without him crying.
This also meant that there was no such thing as having a peaceful walk with him in a stroller. He liked to be held facing outwards (not in an infant carrier).
Sometimes, nothing I did would soothe him and that’s when I really felt like a failure…
When he turned 4 months old we started using the Ergo baby carrier and that was a GAME CHANGER! I was finally able to just put him in a baby carrier facing outwards (I think they have to be like 4 or 5 months old) and go on walks without him crying. Or just do things around the house.
Feedings Were a Challenge
During the first couple of weeks, Caleb did okay with feedings. But after that, he began having a difficult time and would cry, gag, and arch his back if I was breastfeeding him.
Sometimes he would just refuse to feed. I was supplementing with formula from the beginning but that’s when I decided to switch to formula completely and bottle feed. He took the bottle but still had a hard time during and after feeds (he would be irritable and spit up a bunch).
Because of his frequent spit-ups and vomiting, weight gain was SUPER SLOW. He hung around the 10th percentile until about 9 months.
He Would Spit Up ALL THE TIME
Oftentimes, it was not just spit-up but actual projectile vomiting.
We would both go through at least 3 outfit changes a day and I always made sure to have burp cloths and outfits on hand wherever I went.
Caleb was a couple of months old when I figured this is probably baby reflux. We tried almost every formula out there, including non-dairy options and goat milk, but nothing helped (he was formula fed).
Before even getting his reflux diagnosis, I did some of my own research and tried to implement things that could help like smaller more frequent feedings, sleeping on an incline, burping in between feeds, and holding him upright.
Doing all this did improve things slightly but he would still spit up all the time.
Things Eventually Got Better…
It took a while (seemed like an eternity at the time) but things finally started getting better after Caleb turned 6 months. He was diagnosed with GERD at 4 months and given medication which only helped slightly. But after about 6 months, I would say he became less fussy, spit-ups were less frequent, and his sleep improved significantly (thanks to sleep training and a consistent routine).
Car and stroller rides were still a struggle but I could finally see things slowly start getting better!
It wasn’t until he was about 9 months old that the spitting up finally stopped. He was also able to sit up on his own (this helped a ton!) so I was able to put him down without him screaming. And he was finally in the 50th percentile for weight!
By 12 months old is when I would say all of his reflux symptoms were gone except for gagging when he would eat his meals
After turning a year old, he also began tolerating car rides more which was a huge deal for us! No more screaming car rides to church on Sunday!!
Having a baby with reflux really took a toll on my emotional health postpartum and I found myself comparing my motherhood journey to others…
I thought… maybe I’m doing things wrong?? Or…maybe something is wrong with my baby?
I often felt like a failure.
Looking back I now realize that my baby was going through a rough time and it was nothing that I was doing wrong on my end. Going through a rough first year with my baby really built up my patience and molded me as a mom.
Now as Caleb is getting into his “terrible twos” I’m thinking this is a piece of cake (!!!) compared to dealing with GERD in his first year of life.
How Things Are Going Now…
Caleb is now almost a year and eight months and is your typical toddler. He does fairly well in his car seat when we drive somewhere and does not mind the stroller anymore (except for when he decides that he would rather run around).
As far as his eating goes, he has been VERY PICKY since switching to a fully solid diet. He would gag often during meals (although it is much better now).
He will still occasionally gag if he takes a big bite, or if it is a new texture. But other than that he is doing just fine with eating now (praise the Lord!!).
Hey fellow mama, if you find yourself relating to this in your current season I just want to let you know that it will get better and that you are doing an amazing job!!
I cannot even express how incredibly hard it was dealing with GERD so I definitely know how it feels! When I was in the middle of it I could not relate to other moms because it just seemed like they had it so much easier! I would also find myself playing the comparison game and that made me feel like such a failure…
I hope that sharing my experience makes you feel more validated and less alone in case you are going through the trenches of taking care of a fussy baby. This may be colic, baby reflux, or just a high-needs baby.
